Well, I'll be Buggied...

They were alloys as well...

Fish Fence

At a gig on the beach I was talking to a local guy whose English was pretty good but far from perfect. He told me that all local life forms want to get backstage to hang out with the stars - even fish. Apparently they come up with all sorts of excuses for not having a pass, usually a laminate on a lanyard...

"I had one, but I don't have a neck and it slipped off. What do they think we are, stupid? But they keep trying so we have to use a special fish fence to keep them out."

At least I think that's what he said.

The cheques on the posts

A new Guinness world record was on October 24th  when over 250 people twirled chequered flags at the same time.

Seriously.

This may not sound like much of a record, but where would you even get 250 chequered flags in the first place? How about on the beach at Abu Dhabi. It seems a second world record was achieved inadvertently for the greatest number of chequered flags simultaneously indulging in bondage and sunbathing.

For aspirant chequered-flag-world-record-breakers, here is a slightly easier one to go for.

The most chequered flags on a forklift.

Go on, you know you want to...

Something in the Air (Con)

Another star feature of my room in this splendid hotel is that my it is above the air-con farm.

It runs 24/7, but thanks to high quality double glazing, only a low hum is noticeable, and then only at night.

The real upside is that that I cannot hear the slight buzzing of tinnitus... (see here)

Vegging out

Classy hotel this. Nothing left to chance.

All I need now is some dirty veg.

The Chelsea Cabbage Show

There is a backstage 'best garden' competition for Chelsea production folk. Last year Herb won a Silver medal for his Safety Garden. This year's brief required "Innovation, Sustainability (liquid) and the inclusion (this year only) of fantastic creatures OTHER THAN GNOMES (which the judges feel have been rather overdone)" 

The Brief

Again the garden was inspired by Herb whose cabbage plants provided the central theme.

The Banner

The Blurb

The Brassicas


The Bait (and sustainability element)

The water feature
(just incase we had misunderstood 'Sustainability (liquid)' in the brief)

The Fantastic Creature*

However the display of edibles needed some context and Simon demonstrated a surprising ability to source and arrange a wide range of plants, props and materials to show the garden off in style.

The Flower Arranger / Scrounger assesses the display

Herb waits for the judges.

The judges arrive...

...assess...

...and take the bait.

Due to work of a very important nature we missed the awards ceremony but managed to grab this quick shot of the judges deciding what to do next. We imagine the ceremony included words to the effect that...

"...the Gold goes to The Cabbage Garden"
[cheers, applause etc from the vanquished competitors]

The Medal

The Cabbage Garden in all its splendour

Result!

*The Fantastic Creature: The person who actually leaves the office when the fire alarm goes off.

Chelsea Flower Show - History of the wheelbarrow...

In the early days, before mechanical handling, rocks and other gardeny things were manhandled and carried in wheelbarrows which were carved from solid oak and weighed a couple of tons when empty.

Wheelbarrows have progressed since then. Four early iterations are shown here, with their principal usurper lurking in the background.  

An alternative view of the same thing...

This is a hybrid barrow from John Deere.

And here are some more...

I'm bored now... can I stop? 

[Yes - Ed.]